As the title of my post so clearly states, I had a midwives appointment today. Everything checkout out well, apparently I'm measuring 37 weeks, which I don't really believe because it felt like she started the measuring tape lower than usual. But still, on track. Baby Girl's HR was around 130, she's head-down and starting to engage a little, her back is down my left side (so neither posterior nor anterior) and she's been kicking and stretching her feet out straight towards my right side.
One thing we talked about at my appointment was my tentative birth plan. My motivation for having it ready to go for this particular appointment was that, then I could bring it up and in a passively aggressive way I could address some of the concerns that I have with this particular midwife.
Some back story. I wrote a bit about it in my post from when Elijah was born, but basically, she was the midwife who delivered Elijah (I have a team of 3, and they take turns being on call for a week at a time.) At the time, there were things that I wasn't happy with, but tried to overlook because, in the end, my baby was here and he was safe and sound.
But being pregnant again and going through the same midwives has forced me to re-evaluate the whole experience and come to terms with my feelings towards this midwife. I feel like this is an essential thing for me to do, or else I won't be able to relax when I'm in labour, and she's really the only one who I don't have a say about being there or not, so I need to be okay with her being around.
One problem that I've been facing lately is whether or not to talk to her about it. As Matt pointed out, would I be telling her about how I feel just to vent my frustrations, or would I be telling her how I feel because she would take what I was telling her and act differently this time? And if she wouldn't act differently, then would it really be worth it to put that strain on the relationship?
So I thought about this long and hard, and opted for a more passive-aggressive way to go about it. I wrote out my birth plan, and went over it at today's appointment, and as a way of addressing my concerns, I said how I wanted things to go this time.
Here are some examples:
- MW to be there when decisions are made, even if I'm under the care of a doctor at that point (hearkening back to when I had to request that KL come in and explain to me why the nurses were saying I needed Oxytocin all of a sudden.)
-Redirection - instead of saying "Don't scream" (which was all KL would tell me), say, "Trying making this sound instead..."
-Explain logic behind suggestions. Like, if I'm going to be made to walk all the way to L & D, at least tell me why I'm not being carted along in a wheel chair and taking the elevator. Because honestly, I was so mad at KL for that one! And I thought she was being really insensitive later on, suggesting that I go for another walk or try going to the bathroom before I got my epidural. I didn't realize until after-the-fact that those things would have helped to progress labour, even if it hurt.
Those are only a few points, but it felt good to get it out of the way.
Do you know what felt even better though?
Finding out that KL is only on call the week before my due date! WOO HOO! So now KL is on call from Sept. 26 to Oct. 3, KR is on call the next week, then ML, then KR again. So as long as I don't go early, I won't have to worry about it at all! Yay!
Anyway I'm going to wrap this up. Little guy just went down to bed, and I want to paint my toenails. :D
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